Is Ted Koppel counting down the Sunny days on Nightline yet? Is there a sign next to the eyewash station that reads:
It Has Been at Least 1 Day Since the Last Sunny Accident
I'm just warming up, really. I've outlasted the entire Internet before, you know. I hear the mechanized hum of another, Sunny-er world. Where the sun is shining, but no red lights flashing. Here in this darkness, I know what I've done. I know all at once who I am. I am the guy that's making Sunny into the Official Cover Song of the Twenty-Teens.