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Tuesday, March 03, 2015

I Gave My Love a Cherry...





I notice upon reflection that there is too much snark in today's offerings. I apologize unreservedly to Sister Bernadette Mary from first grade. The rest of you can lump it.


My friend Bird Dog is looking for suggestions for where to go in New England.

I suggest: around.

My friend Gerard has a time-honored list of preparations for spring. Get Ready... Get Set... Spring!

Apparently spring is a like a barium enema.

Mozilla not accepted for Google Summer of Code 2015

Firefox was a cat's paw Google used to beat Microsoft. They have their own browser now. I wouldn't buy any green bananas if I "worked" at Mozilla.

We believe that by building housing and cities that are more attuned to people’s needs, we can have a significant positive impact on well-being, personal development, and happiness: Campus.

It was only sprawl when evil developers like me did it. You sure fixed that, didn't you, you little shits.

According to some Amazon sellers, review fraud on Amazon is rampant and obvious, and it fools a lot of people into buying fraudulent products, all while making scam artists millions of dollars in the process. The truth about Amazon.

Snicker. That's not really a problem. The problem is that anyone would be the slightest bit interested in the dreck they're selling, and a much bigger problem is that this is a modest version of the new business model for newspapers.

You might resemble or act more like your mother, but a novel research study from UNC School of Medicine researchers reveals that mammals are genetically more like their dads.

I shave my father's face every day. I never get around to looking for mine. 

Speaking of sons, this is the funniest thing I've seen in ten years: It Has an Unusual Flavor 

I wanna party with Orson Welles. I mean, come on, he's wearing a circus tent for crissakes; he must be fun. 

The Eiffel Tower has new wind turbines, and they're beautiful.

No, they're not. I do like the idea of giving the Mona Lisa a boob job though. And would it hurt to squirt a little Restylane into her lips? They're nowhere near big enough for today's "lamprey woman" style.

What It’s Like to Need Hardly Any Sleep

NY Mag doesn't have any editors, I guess. They misspelled "get" as "need."

A substantial amount of empirical research suggests that cognitive ability test scores are increasing by approximately three IQ points per decade.

Good news people: If you're a salutatorian, in only a century or so, you'll be able to catch up with my son the weirdo. Good for you.  Now go ask Siri what a salutatorian is.

Related: Can video games affect children's cognitive and non-cognitive skills?

Keep on playing World of Warcraft on your iPhone. It's making you more smarterer by the minute. It says so in this document you're unable to understand. Public schools hand out little handheld television sets and call them computers because they have a lower case "i" in their name. It's much the same thing. The smart kids are in Asia putting them together.

9 comments:

julie said...

Speaking of going green, I had to chortle last week when I saw one of the local garbage trucks with prominent green and eco-friendly stickers plastered all over it, belching forth more clouds of black smoke with each engine rev than I've seen collectively since about 1989. I figure they're saving the environment by contributing to global warming. Not so much for us, but to help out our fellow Americans up north who'd like to be able to see the ground by June or so.

Johnny Glendale said...

That Campus thing gave me the willies. Whoever is behind it is sitting on a throne on a yacht somewhere, petting a long haired white cat. Probably looks like Dick Cheney, too. Or Mr. Burns.

Sam L. said...

I don't understand that Google/Mozillla thing.

Welles: I will drink no wine before it's opened.

Campus: Will the Frisco Greenies accept this? I'm guessing protests will occur.

RonF said...

Look at the saw marks on those boards! Who needs a planer?

Leslie said...

One of my homeschool friends, has a son that attends the local community college. She was talking to a scholarship person, asking if her son could be apart of the program for local 8th graders, who get 2 years of classes, when they pledge to finish. She was told he wasn't qualified. When she asked why not, that he was homeschooled and pledged to finish, the scholarship person actually said to her, "He already has an advantage, being homeschooled." Huh.

Gringo said...

As another example of musical hybridization, consider Dwight Yoakum's rendition of Sloop John B. Dwight is from Ohio, with Kentucky born and raised parents. Here he plays with a Bakersfield-Country-Mex style band a Caribbean song popularized by the Beach Boys. Hard to get more hybrid than that.

Thud said...

Great news, If I live another 50 years my IQ will hit triple figures.

chasmatic said...

Analysis of the photo (or "photo" where I come from) reveals a time in the mid-fifties. Just in time for Harry Bellafonte and The Kingston Trio. Note: it is common knowledge that Joan Baez was one of the Trio's groupies. Lawrence Welk did covers of KT songs; Myron Floren brought down the house with his keyboard work on "Tom Dooley."

John The River said...

Link to "Amazon review fraud" broke... If you want I could write a volume on the subject.

Wind turbines on the Eiffel Tower. I notice that nowhere in the article do they indicate what those expensive Whirligigs cost. I expect that as with most wind and solar when you look at the lifespan of the stuff, divide the cost and will come up with a rate per kilowatt that exceeds the regular rate they were already getting. In Boston, with much fanfare they installed wind turbines on the roof of City Hall, around 50K if I remember the number correctly. Blew off a couple of years later. It's all smoke and mirrors.