Sunday, April 14, 2013

I've Been Kissed By Aunt Rose On The Grapes

I never could figure out what the fellow with smallpox and the hot wife was singing about when the original version of this song used to dribble out of the Muzak speakers back in the day. It was like an earworm Rorschach Blotch. And this karaoke version making the rounds of the So Bad It's Good Interverse isn't helping in the forensic lyric investigation department, either.

I've been kicked in the groin and the taint

Believable, but I don't think so.

I've been flicked on my nose in Green Bay

Prolly not.

I've been licked like a pole in a tent


I've been pissed since a quarter to eight

Sounds closer.

I play whist with Tebow and crochet

Getting colder, I think.

I coexist with a goy in Bombay

It shows a spirit of diversity, but I don't think it's accurate.

I have a cyst on my hip, Beyonce

That one right there. I don't care if it's right. When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.

(Don't miss Pavarotti at 1:26. HORK!)


julie said...


I literally lol'ed, and yet could only make it through about ten seconds. I have a new respect for your stamina and fortitude.

Casey Klahn said...

1:01 was all I could fathom, Julie!

Joe Cocker can make funny gestures, mumble, and bravura through any song and it's art. If any of us try this, it is unseemly.

leelu said...

Mondegreens and spam (@ 11:12).

At least, I'm hoping they're mondegreens. I haven't the nerve to listen.

The spam somehow seems to fit...

Sam L. said...

Weelllll, I cain't an' I won't comment on what might be the lyrics or words or somethin'; but I'll tell you this: yesterday, a guy on our local radio played Great Balls Of Fire, sung by (Y'ain't gonna b'lieve it), Tiny Tim. Jerry Lee woulda been proud!