Monday, January 31, 2011

Mi Dispiace Per Tutto

Men used to wear loafers to the beach. Now they wear sandals to board meetings. Time marches on, I guess.

I don't get around much anymore, myself. Two children and three jobs and no money might explain it -- but it doesn't. Picture the Intertunnel. All the stuff that's in it. It's grown too small for me, no matter how gargantuan it gets. It's becoming two mirrors pointed at each another. Small and infinite.

I love it so, anyway, the Intertunnel. I saw it as a kind of meritocracy. Say what you like, and see if anyone pays attention. Credentials for sitting still didn't apply. It's more roped and branded now. Still light years ahead of newspapers, TV, and magazines, though. It's gone from anarchy to a sort of Schedule C organization. At least it doesn't have an HR office and mandatory golf outings yet.

I said I was sorry up at the header. I should get back to that. Lots (lots) of people email me, and mention me on their websites, and say kind things about me (or at least notice me), and I often don't see them right away, and the formal informal Intertunnel protocol escapes me a lot. Hell, regular manners are often beyond me.

I often get a little tickle when I'm directed one Interplace or another, and discover bits of me there. Someday, I'm hoping I'll walk into an second-hand store and find one of my pieces of furniture for sale in it. It will be sort of the same thing.

I'm grateful for my readers, because no man writes for no one. I have no idea who's using my Amazon box to buy things, but people do, and I'm grateful for that, too. People that visit my website buy my furniture, too, and that's how my children get fed, so I'm grateful for that, too. I'm grateful for a lot of things right now. And I appreciate that people link to what I write, and wish I had time to reciprocate properly, and knew what the hell "properly" is in the first place.

I have no idea if Pundit and Pundette are the General Motors of opinion or are an Internet lemonade stand. Mi dispiace --again-- because I didn't know they existed. Like I said, I don't get around much anymore. But they seem pleasant. Of course they seem pleasant to me; they talk about me. I put them in my pathetic blogroll, so they can rub shoulders with people that haven't written anything in four years but I haven't the heart to erase, or I just haven't noticed they're dead yet. Sorry. I apologize for saying I'm sorry again. Forgive me. Oops, I regret that last act of contrition.

I've grown weary of the Two Minutes Hate available over wide bands of the Internet. It was easier to avoid when only one side was doing it. Having the Two Minutes Hate rebuttal is just Four Minutes Hate. A lot of people could use a good, sound ignoring. Nothing else will work on them, anyway.

Someone tell a joke, or post pictures of Grace Kelly instead of Helen Thomas.

Thanks in advance,


vanderleun said...

Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a cow ran in front of the car.

The driver tried to avoid it but couldn’t - the cow was killed.

Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what happened.

About an hour later, the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray. He was holding a bottle of wine in one hand, a cigar in the other and smiling happily.

"What happened?" asked Hillary.

"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the wine, his wife gave me the cigar, and their beautiful daughter made mad passionate love to me."

"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.

The driver replied: ’I’m Hillary Clinton’s driver, and I just killed the cow.’

vanderleun said...

Sixty Grit said...

I and a coworker once wrote a series explanations for decoding personal ads. This was in the early 90s. I sent it in email form to a variety of friends, and what do you know, it kept popping up all over the place. Heard it on the radio once on a business trip to DC. Read it in the local paper. That made me laugh. It's probably still floating around here somewhere...

Okay - I just ran a google search - what do you know, out of 35,900,000 entries our list was the first one - the internet rules!

Man, that is funny - word for word, as originally written nearly 20 years ago.

Okay, back to grinding planer blades - it's not as if I can sit around writing timeless humor and get paid for it - nope - this is a new world we inhabit.

Kenneth said...

Although we pose as a nation of intellectual sophisticates when in the spotlight of this brand new medium, we're fragile embryos and actually just learning to crawl. Considerate and/or coordinated social crawling is still years in the future, and current clumsiness more indicates skill level and individual inhibitions than conscious malicious intent.

Sixty Grit said...

S/B "series of explanations". Freezing here - cannot type...

Ruth Anne Adams said...

I call the move out of the educational industrial complex becoming 'radical squares.'

SippicanCottage said...

RAA- Radical Squares unite!

DaBear said...

Radical Squares ? I love it !!!