My Cant Hook Can't Cant Hook Like That

Not sure exactly where in Maine these fellers are. The other videos appended to this one mention Litchfield, which is south and east of here.

Maine is really big, and has very few people living in it. The state of Maine is as big in area as all the other New England states combined, and there are only 1.3 million people here. The largest city in Maine is Portland, and it's one-tenth the size of Boston, which is a small city anyway.

People from Maine refer to people not from Maine as from away. You're a flatlander, or maybe a Massh*le.  I have been living in Maine for two years now. I like it here. People are friendly and wary at the same time, if that's possible. You're OK with them until you prove otherwise. Many people from away prove otherwise immediately, and continuously, after moving here to escape the purgatory they helped make somewhere else. Me, I've found lots of people here I have nothing in common with that I get along famously with. You'll be left alone here if you really want it. I can't help but notice there's a lot of empty houses around here, filled with the imaginary people that claim to want to be left alone.

There's a fetish for milquetoasts to prepare themselves for doomsday nowadays. It's for amusement, for the most part, like most such things. Don't they wonder how foolish they look to people who've known every day of their lives that doomsday is every day if you don't work?

I Know This Is Going To Sound Outrageous, But Here Goes: Rod Stewart Was Actually Pretty Good For A Couple Of Months In The Seventies

As The Jaded Pornographer Used To Say, I'm Running Out Of Places To Put It

What an appetite for denying objective reality the media has. I'm forced to read the local papers now, something I haven't done in many years. They have run story after story about the "snowless winter." As I understand it, it's been entirely caused by my stubborn refusal to remove the three 100 watt incandescent bulbs I have in the basement. The waste heat from those babies got the temperature down there almost warm enough to get the CFL in the fourth socket to emit a little light. I apologize unreservedly.

Of course the part of the snowless winter that stubbornly refuses to show up is a lack of snow. A local school has already announced the kids have to stay later in June to make up for all the missed days. Of course the story said that even though there was no snow, it sure did snow a lot.  It may not have been a very snowy winter... is the opening line of the story. I've read a hundred of these.

We trick-or-treated in eight inches of snow. But that's the fall! It doesn't count. It's snowed more or less continuously for the last week, but I guess that doesn't count for some other reason.

I've been here for three winters now. This is the most snow now on the ground there's been for all three on this date. It's average for around here. I didn't move to Maine expecting it not to snow. One grows weary of being told you're shoveling four inches of partly cloudy, though.

[Update: Monday's local paper says: "Warm weather bumps big-air competition to Sunday at Black Mountain in Rumford".  The observed temperature in Rumford, Maine for Saturday March 3rd: 37 degrees Farenheit. The average historical daytime high in Rumford, Maine for March 3rd? 37 degrees Farenheit.]

Put On Your Wig, Woman

Junior Walker and the All-Stars are in second place behind Steely Dan for words that had never been assembled in that order before.
I heard a rumor that the Fashion Police executed the dancers right after the show.

Lost Horizon

One can't help but be affected more by personal experience than information gained at a distance. I've only been to San Francisco once, for one day, about twenty-five years ago, and it was one of the darkest, coldest, dirtiest, unfriendliest places I've ever been in. A toll booth operator can ruin a whole state for me, so maybe I'm more stiff-necked about such matters than most people. But if I see the words: San Francisco in print, my mind fills autofills a: bah! right after it. Still, my mind triumphs over my heart now and again and you get interested in things for their own sake. San Francisco is durn interesting, and has been for a long time. It matters. But all in all, I'd rather go there in 1955 than now. How handy that you can.